Get Your Priorities Straight

In Parshas Matos (32,16), the tribes of Reuven and Gad come to Moshe with a request to settle in Trans-Jordan. They explain to Moshe that, due to their substantial herds of sheep and cattle, the territory acquired on the opposite side of the Jordan would better accommodate their requirements. Moshe reacts angrily, worried that they are about to repeat the same mistake that occurred 40 years earlier with the sending of the spies. In response to Moshe’s accusation, they say that they will construct pens for their flocks and homes for their children, and they will join the other tribes in the conquest of the Land, only returning to their homes in Trans-Jordan afterward. After hearing their true intentions, Moshe instructs them, ‘Build cities for your children and pens for your flocks.’

Basing his comments on the insights from the Midrash Tanchuma, Rashi highlights that Moshe modifies the sequence of the initial request. The tribes prioritized their flocks over their children by putting them first. While Moshe, in his response, reverses this order by placing children before flocks, indicating that their priorities were misaligned. They valued possessions over their children. Following this dialogue, the two tribes place their children before their flocks.

Benefits of Priorities

The Cambridge dictionary defines priority as an element judged more crucial than other concerns. Micro priorities, as the name implies, refer to the arrangement of short-term tasks, typically of a more urgent character. This includes arranging a daily schedule and appointments to avoid scheduling conflicts, thereby enabling the fulfillment of all daily objectives. In contrast, macro priorities are the setting of priorities for the overarching aspects of life. These encompass career paths, ethical and religious values, and personal standards. A person establishes these through introspection and the formulation of life goals.

What are the measurable benefits of setting priorities both on a small scale and a large scale? People need to feel they have control over their lives. Prioritization enables individuals to manage and control their time. When tasks are clearly defined and prioritized by importance, they become easier to handle. The easier a task is to manage, the more likely it is to be successfully completed. This, in turn, gives a person a sense of achievement. As someone feels more accomplished, their productivity tends to increase accordingly.

Establishing life objectives and priorities is fundamental for an individual's emotional stability. Someone who navigates life with their goals and priorities in harmony will be less stressed. Their life takes on a sense of

purpose, enabling them to live to their fullest potential. Macro-prioritization helps an individual understand the broader context, avoiding the pitfalls of being bogged down by everyday tasks that can contribute to stress.

Establishing Priorities

Life coaches and therapists commonly use a "wheel of life" chart to aid individuals in visualizing their priorities and recognizing which elements of their lives need balance. The chart is structured like a wheel, divided into 8 to 10 sections. Each section is labeled with a distinct life area that the individual considers important to their life. Each section is rated on a satisfaction scale ranging from 0 (the lowest) to 10 (the highest). The wheel is used to identify which life areas yield satisfaction for the individual, which areas are associated with dissatisfaction, and which areas they would like to improve.

People believe their actions align with their priorities. A significant outcome of the wheel of life and similar activities is that they frequently assist individuals in recognizing what they truly value in life. It is no longer a theoretical concept; they have tangible evidence regarding the areas they regard as significant, allowing them to evaluate whether they are meeting their aspirations. A beneficial strategy is to complete a wheel of life, assess it, and use it as a catalyst for change or improvement. After a year or more, revisit the worksheet and compare the two. This process will help individuals track their progress.

Without a doubt, had Moshe asked the tribes of Reuven and Gad if they valued their animals more than their children, they would have responded with a firm no. Through his subtle reprimand, Moshe highlighted the importance of reassessing one's priorities. He was, in effect, urging them to consider if their actions were congruent with their priorities. A person who invests time in examining their priorities and actively works to align their life with them will lead a happier and more satisfying life.